10 Ways to Parent the Best You Can

by Laura C. Ries

It seems that parents worry about the job they are doing. The hospital just shows you how to feed, burp, change and wash the baby. However, what a child during the years of development expand to so much more. What is a parent to do?

Here are some ideas. Pick the parts that work best for you. If you are like me, different things will work at different times as the kids grow up.

 1. Your parent's model. There are lots of things your parents did right. Focus on that and not the things they didn't do. If you think about the amount of knowledge that was available to them, they did the best they could. Take the parts you like best of what your parents did. Do that and see how it works for you and your kids. Adjust if needed to meet your needs.

 2. Experts. There is so much information on parenting right now. Books, seminars, websites, etc from tons of experts. Utilize this information to allow you to be the best parent you can be.

 3. Experts - A word of caution on the experts. They are talking in generalities. They may not have seen your situation. Not all their advice is going to work for you and your family. Evaluate what they are saying and determine if it will fit into what you want in your life.

 4. Kids personalities. Oh, each child is different. They will respond to different approaches in different ways. Get to know your kids personality and how to best utilize it in how you raise them.

 5. Opposite of what parents did - Sometimes we need to just do the opposite of what our parents did. Just to be able to say, "In this instance, I didn't do it like they did". It's OK. What your parents did may be opposite of what their parents did.

 6. Intuition - You know more than you may be giving yourself credit for. Allow yourself some time and space to think about what 'feels' right to you. Don't be surprised if this is the best answer of all.

 7. Try something new - If you have gotten into a rut, or if the kids have outgrown what used to work, try something new. Even if it seems strange, what is worse it to keep doing something that doesn't work.

 8. Other parents, that have same aged kids - Meet some of your kids friends parents. It is good to know them and what their rules are. First to be able to counter the "but his parent's let him." If you know their rules, you can better counter this argument. Also, they may have some ways of doing things that you'd like to implement.

 9. Other parents, that have older aged kids - These parents are a great resource. They've lived through the experience and lived to tell about it. They can put a new perspective on what you are going through.

 10. Ask your kids - Your kids have some great insight. They would love to talk to you about life and how the family system works or doesn't work. Find out what they think. Getting to help set the rules and consequences, and making plans for fun, may cause the kids to be more motivated when it comes time to actually do stuff. 

About the Author

Laura has been a parent for 22 years, 13 as a single parent. Her goal has been to raise her three children so they'd know how to make decisions, create goals and achieve them. And now she's teaching what she knows to other parents.